Wednesday, August 22, 2007

Dealing with the every day...

It's official. Pilot has flown the state. As of Sunday afternoon our wonderful visit came to an end. Yes, life does go on. It returns to a "normal" routine, a much slower, less hectic pace. Oh who am I kidding?! Yes, life does seem to ratchet up a notch when Pilot is home, there are certainly later hours, more cooking to be done and more plans made for each day. But when he leaves I seem to be just as busy...just not with the fun things that pop up when he is home.

In fact, I went shopping yesterday and today---just looking. I was totally amazed at what is out there! Then I realized that I really haven't been out browsing for several years! No wonder I am behind the times.

We had our appt with the oncologist/surgeon this afternoon. Things are looking very nice from his point of view. He did tell us that Pilot Dad's recovery will take up to a year for completion. What that means, for example, is his taste buds will continue to change/improve but when May rolls around what taste buds he has and how well they are working is what they will be from then on. At the end of a year will be what his "new" normal will be. Because of the type of cancer he was diagnosed with (it is a very fast growing cancer [squamous cell carcinoma]), and the fact it had entered the lymph nodes this doctor will be very aggressive in his picture taking for the first two years. Then, if nothing has reoccurred he will back off slightly on the number of pictures he will take. Pilot Dad has a 45% chance of the cancer recurring. Now, I know that my God is far and away much greater than any percentage. It's another one of those times when you hear what the doctor says, you acknowledge what he has told you, and then you turn immediately to the Lord and lay it all on the altar for Him to do with as He sees fit.

"Waiting in hope means that we rest our faith and expectation, not in what God will do for us, but on God who is our hope and expectation." ~Jan Frank, author
It means choosing to live out the truth of Micah 7:7: "But as for me, I watch in hope for the LORD, I wait for God my Savior; my God will hear me."

I believe we find our true self in the midst of suffering,
pain, and sorrow, not in the absence of it. Don't ask me why this is so; it just
is. Maybe it's because trials reveal the shallowness in us or teach us to depend
on a power greater than ourselves. Or because it dims the attractions the world
has to offer and casts a bright light onto spiritual realities. I tend to think
it's because we find in our suffering a point of identity with Jesus the Christ,
the One who suffered in our place. There is no closer fellowship with our Lord
than "the fellowship of His sufferings." It's a place of "knowing" more
intimate, more precious than any human connection. In this place, He reveals
Himself and open up spiritual truth. ~A New Kind of Normal, pg. 78


passing-thru said...

I don't think I read a post more intensely than this one - a mature, grounded in faith, "settling" in God and resting in "Who" HE is , A kind caring benevolent Father who allows things to bring us closer to Him --
Thanks so much for sharing and we are praying that God shows doctors what real statistics are -- your friend, Bob

Terry said...

This is an incredible post Pilot-mom.
It must be that the Lord is staying so close to you and Pilot-dad as you are going through all of this, and that you are staying close to Him and with no complaints are clinging to Him.
What an example of faith you are to us Pilot-mom!..Love Terry

David Warren Fisher said...

Claire: I'm so thrilled that you had a great visit with Pilot! It must be hard to see him go! I'm praying (we all are) along with you concerning Pilot Dad. We know that God is greater than any diagnosis.

Thanks so much for your input and output with Pilgrim Pals. I'm so glad that you're part of us...a huge part.



hebrews 11:1 said...

Dear Pilot Mom,

Thank you for posting...and what a post this is! You are such a Godly example...and such an encouragement.

May God bless and keep you and your family,